While it’s clear now that I’ve always lived with OCD, it became almost unbearable during the pandemic. The thoughts were so intrusive, and so obsessive, that most days I was afraid to do anything. I was completely unaware of the disorder, but began to fear being around loved ones, terrified of what thought would get stuck in their presence. I no longer enjoyed watching TV, or even reading books. Everything felt unsafe. I would constantly monitor my body for feelings which only made it worse, and out of desperation try to get reassurance whenever I could. After a year working with a talk therapist, she suggested I look into getting diagnosed with OCD. I worked with a specialist after that, who taught me ERP and gave me a better understanding of the disorder. Learning and practicing ERP was scary, but over time it helped. After about 8 months, I knew I needed more to recover the way I dreamt of recovering, although it still felt impossible. I’d followed Rob’s page for awhile and was always awestruck by how spot on every single post was, and how much I related. I finally reached out, and I am forever grateful that I did. ROCD was the theme that scared me most and had stuck. My husband and I had wanted to start trying to have a child but I was terrified of doing so when my mental health was still so rocky. After every session with Rob, I left feeling optimistic. He taught me how to get back to a place of rationality and get underneath the fears that were keeping me stuck. Between our sessions and the tools he provides, I finally started to get my life back. I am now 35 weeks pregnant and so excited to meet our first baby. I’ve had an extremely symptomatic pregnancy, throwing up everyday, so much nausea, threw my back out, have crazy heartburn, while still working full time, and yet I can honestly say my recovery journey has never felt more strong, and most days I’m in total gratitude. Because of the work I’ve done with Rob and Nick, I’m able to experience and face my fears differently. I still have my difficult moments, but they no longer consume me, or take over my days. I’ve never felt closer to my husband, and the ROCD thoughts have all but vanished. I truly did not think recovery like this was possible, but it is. I know that no matter what the future holds, I have the tools and support I need.